It’s 1918, and in a letter to a friend, Henri Matisse writes of Nice: “It’s like a paradise you have no right to analyse.” 108 years later, faced with Thailand’s Iniala Beach House, I find myself at a similar loss.

You see, this is classic luxury. Just across a bridge from the madness of Phuket amid the raw nature of Phang Nga. A long expansive beach with coconut palms and crystal waters; the seductive sound of silence; intimate firelit dinners on the sand; ten singular suites and your personal villa manager; private pools and spas … but there are things here at this Natai Beach Design Hotels member that you have no right to analyse.

There’s the entrance courtyard where the Campana Brothers‘ ceramic columns — 600 hours in the making, with elephants, turtles and flowers hidden in the glazed fragments — set the tone for what follows: a living room with walls totally encrusted in blue and white plates, and a plush cinema inspired by the colours and textures of lush Thai rainforests.

There’s ‘The Carpenter’s Suite’, anchored by Irish artist Joseph Walsh’s one-off sculptural ash wood bed valued at some $200,000; the surrealist Penthouse with its memory foam carpets and a bath that emerges from the floor like a sand dune; outdoor jungle showers draped in theatrical tropical foliage; and, oh, a Michelin-starred restaurant from decorated British chef, Simon Rogan. Analyse that.

We’re greeted at the gates by the hotel manager and our personal villa manager, and taken on a short tour of the property before checking into the beachfront ‘Owner’s Suite’; the 51 square metre, Jaime Hayón-designed slice of haute luxury that we’ll call home for the next 48 hours. We have an expansive bathroom, with double shower room and gargantuan custom Hayón bathtub, swirling couch with another vast Hayón original overhead, outdoor loungers on the edge of the sand, and a high, arched, beach-villa style ceiling. As its name suggests, our suite was once the home of Iniala owner, Mark Weingard, whose presence can be felt throughout.

Weingard is not your typical hotelier. A self-made Mancunian who narrowly missed the second plane hitting the World Trade Centre on 9/11, and who lost his fiancée in the Bali bombings the following year, he responded to tragedy the only way he knew how. By building something. First a foundation in Annika’s name, then, after the 2004 tsunami destroyed his house on this very beach, a hotel. A hotel that you have no right to analyse. Weingard handed carte blanche to 11 world-class designers, with a single brief: every room must be out of the ordinary. And that they are.

From São Paulo’s Campana Brothers and Cork’s Joseph Walsh to Madrid’s Jaime Hayón, the roster reads like a who’s who of cutting-edge design. Elsewhere, Spanish architects A-cero bring organic, seaweed-curved forms to the Seashell Suites; Moscow’s Philosophy of Design populate Villa Bianca’s common areas with playful, functional Matryoshka dolls; Istanbul’s Autoban blend sophistication and craft in the two Pool Residences; local Thai designer Eggarat Wongcharit roots the Lotus and Siamese Suites in the traditions of his homeland; and Mark Brazier-Jones — designer to film and rock royalty, whose style has been described as “neo-classical space age baroque” — brings dark, jewel-coloured, gothic sensuality to the Boudoir Suite.

As the sun begins to set on our first day in the ‘Owner’s Suite’, our villa manager escorts us a few short steps across the sand to Anaalā Thailand, the hotel’s beach (literally) restaurant helmed by award-winning chef Ian Kittichai. Bare feet in the sand, deep red sun dropping off the horizon, we kick off with an amuse bouche of sashimi-grade tuna, shallot, cilantro, roasted sticky rice and chilli in a limestone water tartlet, followed by a salad of soft-shell crab, pomelo and coconut sauce.

Dusk follows sunset, tiki torches and a wood fire are lit, and we’re presented with ‘tom kha gai’, a coconut broth with chicken, mushroom and chilli oil. A trio of main courses follow: Massaman curry with Australian beef short rib, a stir fry of mixed vegetables, and a simply stunning grilled grouper with turmeric, coriander and betel leaves. Thai staple mango sticky rice wraps things up and we’re left to take in the sound of soft waves lapping against the shore and absolutely nothing else.

Breakfast is an a la carte affair served in the plate-encrusted Campana Lounge that looks out over the beachfront infinity pool, and after a short dip in said pool, it’s not long until we’re off for a Thai cooking class in the kitchen that looked after us so well the night before. One of the Iniala’s signature experiences, the ‘Gastronomic Journey’ begins with a walk through a local fruit and vegetable market with one of the chefs, designed to acquaint you with the abundance of rich flavours and ingredients that make up Thai cuisine.

Following a busy few days we regrettably opt out of the market visit, but a brilliant class with a charismatic chef more than makes up for it. A revelation, as it turns out. Thai cooking is an exercise in delicacy, each flavour clean and precisely placed. We eat the resulting pomelo salad and green chicken curry back in the lounge, the Campana’s inspired ode to traditional Thai architecture feeling entirely right.

But for all its extraordinary design credentials, Iniala Beach House is ultimately a place to slow down. To soak in the (exceedingly impressive) bathtub, to walk the beach, and to take in the raw, unhurried nature that surrounds it; a world away from the tourist trails that are so near yet so far. To catch rays by the pool, to lose yourself in the details like their art collection (some 40-plus works from Southeast Asia’s leading artists), to simply exhale or, if the mood takes you, to work off a little of this excessive relaxation with a personal Muay Thai class.

And this is all with but a cursory mention of Aulis Phuket; Simon Rogan’s intimate 15-seat chef’s table, and the first restaurant in Phang Nga to receive a Michelin star.

Beginning life as a sort of test kitchen for Rogan’s three Michelin-starred L’Enclume in the English Lake District, Aulis’s intimate concept went on to open in London and Hong Kong, before arriving here in 2023. The philosophy remains the same, with a reverence for provenance at the core of this chef’s table experience. Needless to say, that experience is a seriously impressive one that will be featured separately. For now, all that needs to be said is that it is predictably extraordinary, and for that it feels entirely at home here.

Some places you have no right to analyse. Iniala Beach House is one of them.

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Photography, courtesy Iniala Beach House Thailand / © We Heart.