The Best Swinger Sites to Find Couples, Singles & Open-Minded Locals in 2022

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The Best Swinger Sites to Find Couples, Singles & Open-Minded Locals in 2022

Best swinger sites & apps for finding local, open-minded swingers in 2022

Why bring drama into your home with an illicit affair when you can just be honest and admit, “Yes, honey, I want to swing!” This is where our best swinger sites come in.

Maybe you were surprised at how game your partner was about swinging and now here you are – two hot married folks ready to party!

No worries, we’ve compiled a list of the top swinger dating sites to help you get mutually laid.

Let’s get to it!

Best Swinger Websites: First Look

1. Best swinger site overall – AdultFriendFinder
2. Most discreet swingers website – Ashley Madison
3. Best swingers meetup – SwingLifeStyle
4. Best swinger club listings – SDC
5. Best niche swinger search – SwapFinder
6. Kinkiest vanilla swinger site – Alt.com
7. Best extreme fetish site – FetLife
8. Best free swinger dating – Reddit Swingers R4R
9. Best threesomes swinger site – Seeking
10. Safest swinger app or dating site – Kasidie
11. Nice for “bear” gay men – Scruff
12. Nice for bi-curious gay men – Grindr
13. Great for finding lesbian swinger partners – HER
14. Some “Just looking” swingers fun – Tinder
15. Swinger lovers or just friends – Bumble
16. The weirdest swinger experiences! – Craigslist

1. Adult Friend Finder – Best Overall Swingers Site

Adult Friend Finder

Pros:

— Friendly people & 80 million members
— Video or text chat with members live
— Lots of community stuff to break the ice
FREE to join

Cons:

— A bit pricey, at $39.95 a month

Established in 1996, AdultFriendFinder is one of the most trusted names in the alternative lifestyle, matching together swingers, poly families, BDSM players, and even online shenanigans.

The site has a nice free preview section with browsing, who viewed me notifications, a social feed, blogs, discussion forums, live chat rooms, and even video chat.

Registration: 5/5

To join AdultFriendFinder is super quick, easy, and best of all – free!
You only need to enter basic information such as your name, date of birth, and so on, verify your email and you’re ready to connect with some hot singles right away.

You can join as a couple and set your limits and wants on the public profile.

After following a few locals and viewing their social streams – we made contact with a number of couples as well as a few stags and hens individually.

Pricing: 4.9/5

While you do have to pay for a full membership to send messages and interact (pricing begins at $39.95 per month), the community aspect is why we found AFF our top choice.

We had a good balance of real people messaging us, a few bots, and a few moderators who just wanted us to feel welcomed. Overall, AFF had the best results that justified the expense.

Features: 4.9/5

Another thing that’s great about AdultFriendFinder is the abundance of features that you’ll be presented with.

Some of our favourites include live streaming, the ability to tip your favourite members, and a wild “erotic stories” section, to read about other user experiences or fantasies.

2. Ashley Madison – Best Discreet Swinger Dating Site

Ashley Madison

Pros:

— Secure & anonymous
Premium version FREE for women
— Three different filters for photos
— Discreet site for couples

Cons:

— A lot of cheaters, not swingers

Ashley Madison doesn’t have as many features as AFF but does benefit from a well-known reputation and approximately 60 million members.

The site also has some of the best tools for anonymous usage. You can count on a secure encrypted website, blurring/blackout/mask filters for photos, and private photo sharing.

Registration: 4.7/5

The registration process is fairly simple, and you’ll need the most basic to join.
However, the site does require you to enter your current relationship status, ethnicity, and height – which some new members may find off-putting.

Pricing: 4.8/5

Great news for women: Ashley Madison is completely free for you to join!

Men don’t need to fret as the initial fees are affordable. However, for extra perks and features, you’ll need to shell out a few bucks – starting at $64.99 for 100 credits.

Features: 4.9/5

Ashley Madison presents a wide range of features that you can choose from.

TravelingMan is quite popular as it allows you to get dates while on the road, and if you really want to catch more fish – the PriorityMan function boosts your profile for a set period of time!

Additionally, almost everyone blurs their public photos at AM (a handy feature), until some trust is established.

Your profile can state explicitly what you’re looking for, including discretionary fun with other couples. If you’re paranoid about being “exposed” in your community in a not-so-fun way, Ashley Madison is a safe bet.

3. SwingLifeStyle – Best Swingers Site for Meetups

SwingLifeStyle

Pros:

— Single swingers welcome
— Events & parties
— Join groups or start your own

Cons:

— Limited free preview

SwingLifeStyle offers to help you start your own sexual revolution by connecting you with swingers near your home city, as well as a broader search.

You can chat with new people, have a social media feed, use forums, or even take advantage of swingers events organised by your fellow kinksters.

SLS is a meetup and dating site in one!

Registration: 4.9/5

When it comes to creating an account – there is very little you need, the site doesn’t even require you to upload a profile photo!

All you need is your name, date of birth, and email. However, you won’t be able to register via Facebook.

Pricing: 4.7/5

While SwingLifeStyle is free to join, you won’t be able to send or read any messages like you would on AdultFriendFinder.

Luckily, the swinger site isn’t overly expensive as you can get a Premium membership starting at $9.98 a month.

Features: 4.6/5

While SwingLifeStyle does have only a few features – they’re pretty great!

The “Hot Date” feature allows you to use a public calendar on the site to land a potential member (or members) to meet on a particular date. Basically, this function almost resembles speed dating in a way.

You can also search for swingers clubs around the U.S. (hosted in bars and nightclubs exclusively for swingers), join specific groups, or become a “group owner” and start having your own events for fellow members.

The site even links to a ToplessTravel site that arranges for swinger party airfare.

SwingLifeStyle is more of a meetup site for swingers than just a dating service and that’s a nice touch for shy couples.

4. SDC (Swingers Date Club) – Best Swinger Club Listings

Swingers Date Club

Pros:

— Categories of fellow swingers
— Clubs, businesses, lifestyle options
— Member discounts to various places

Cons:

— Fairly pricey at $25 a month
— Lacks free communication tools

Swingers Date Club feels more like an actual club than just an online dating site. It’s easy to get started chatting, with features like social feeds, messengers, speed dating ads, photo and writing contests, parties and events, and even a travel calendar.

Registration: 4.6/5

Signing up is pretty easy and you can even sign up with your partner as a couple.

However, make sure you have a few minutes on hand as SDC does require you to answer plenty of questions like your swing status and what kind of partner/partners you’re looking for.

Pricing: 4.6/5

The good news is that you can try out SDC for free. The not-so-good news is that you won’t be able to message any potential members unless you upgrade, though you can read the first message at no cost.

The membership plans are a little pricey when compared to our other competitors. Starting at $29.95 for a monthly plan. However, if you feel like this site is the one for you – you can always get the lifetime membership for $250!

Features: 4.7/5

One of SDC’s best features is the social feed, which groups all of its members into different categories, like popularity, “currently traveling to”, or resident, or even speed dating nights at random porn theatres.

The site offers one of the best searches for swingers, and not just ads, but also events, swinger clubs, stores, and other adult opportunities in town.

SDC is the best option if you need a guiding hand for your first time. Considering the member discounts to various stores and businesses, and even a lifetime membership, it’s a cost-effective site as well.

5. SwapFinder – Best of the Niche Swinger Dating Sites

SwapFinder

Pros:

— Live cam or text chat
— Forums & fetishes geared towards swingers
— Large & active member base

Cons:

— Limited preview
— Similar to AdultFriendFinder in features

You can’t fault Swap Finder for its layout. It’s user-friendly and mimics AdultFriendFinder’s navigation outstandingly. You can search for live cameras, live chat rooms, join forums, and read blogs for more creative interaction.

Registration: 4.6/5

Creating an account on SwapFinder can be as anonymous as you want it to be. You don’t need to enter your real name or upload a profile picture, and you can register just by using your email address.

While we love the simplicity – it can often leave you a tad disappointed when browsing members with limited profile information.

Pricing: 4.6/5

SwapFinder allows you to create an account for free on their site, but you won’t be able to read or send any messages to other members.

Monthly memberships start from $39.95 per month.

Features: 4.7/5

It’s a welcoming site for member video feeds.

You can see hot couples and singles on camera and quickly get to the gist of your kinky conversation.

Other great features include “Sex Academy” which is full of great info and tips for new swingers, and “Groups” where you’re able to connect with other like-minded members such as yourself.

Perhaps the only flaw is that Swap Finder is more of a niche search site like AFF, rather than a new site competing against AFF.

6. Alt.com – Kinkiest Swinger Couple Website

Alt.com

Pros:

— Quality members
— Caters to all kinds of kinks
— Watch live videos of models

Cons:

— Not much of a free preview
— Not many contacting features

Alt.com is a kink site, with fetishes ranging from slightly vanilla to extreme BDSM. The site has no ads since members pay for expenses.

This means Alt.com has fewer fake profiles than other sites because it’s more difficult to join. Alt.com also offers free profile creation, flirting, adding friends, joining adult chat rooms, and kink searches.

Registration: 4.7/5

Registering on Alt.com shouldn’t take you more than 5 minutes, as it’s very straightforward.
You’ll also have the option to sign up as a woman, man, couple, or transgender – making it very inclusive.

Additionally, Alt.com enforces a very strict verification process, so make sure to verify your email first.

Pricing: 4.5/5

Unless you opt for a premium account, you won’t be able to send any messages and you’ll only be able to read one free received message.

Alt.com comes with different membership tiers. A Silver Membership works out at about $19.95 per month and offers unlimited access to all profiles as well as extra perks.

Whereas a Gold membership starts at $29.95 a month, and grants you full access to all blogs, posts, and magazine features, boosts your profile at the top of search results, and more.

Features: 4.4/5

Paid members can interact with other members and their profiles are pushed in search results.

You can also access blogs, videos, and instant messenger information of your favourite (trusted) users. There are also pay-per-minute adult movies to watch with your kinky new friends.

However, we found the availability of features slightly lacking when compared to AFF and Ashley Madison.

7. FetLife – Best Dating Sites for Swinger Fetishes

FetLife

Pros:

— Free for most features, including chat
— Easy to follow & befriend new people
— Great for casual encounters

Cons:

— No video content with free membership
— Outdated site layout

Fetlife is virtually free since it only charges you to view member videos.

However, you can still chat for free, follow and make friends for free, and join swinger forums and even forums for local swingers nearby.

FetLife is not exactly vanilla. After all, if you click on a user’s profile, you don’t just see their partner’s name, but also their slaves, masters, kinks, fetishes, genitals, and what other member photos they’re liking – some of which may involve beeswax or something, who knows.

Still, the site and app work as a mostly-free alternative to Reddit that has far more members

Registration: 4.5/5

Signing up at FetLife is pretty quick, easy, and free – which we appreciate.

However, you’ll need to make sure you have your phone nearby as you’ll have to verify it. Also, it’s worth keeping in mind that you won’t be able to link your FetLife account with other social media accounts.

Pricing: 4.5/5

While creating an account and reading/sending messages is free on FetLife, if you want added perks and features you’ll need to opt for a premium account.

While it’s generally more affordably priced, you will need to choose from either a 6-month plan costing $30.00, 12 months for $60, or a 2-year plan amounting to $120. There doesn’t seem to be a monthly option available.

Features: 4.6/5

It doesn’t look like FetLife hosts an abundance of features for you to enjoy, still, the perks the site offers are pretty great!

You can join interesting discussion groups to connect with like-minded swingers, use the “Fetishes” feature to explore what other members are into, and check out any upcoming events or meetings nearby.

8. Seeking – Best Swinger Couple Site for Threesomes

Seeking

Pros:

— 4-1 female to male ratio
— Orgies, groups, threesomes & more
— Women join for free

Cons:

— Pricey to use
— Some fake profiles

Seeking is definitely an upscale party – and too pricey for some users! However, this sugar daddy/sugar baby site is a favourite among swingers, because it’s where they can find an arrangement by consent and clear negotiation.

Registration: 4.5/5

After providing some basic details about yourself such as date of birth, name, and location – it’s all smooth sailing from there!

However, you’ll need to verify your profile via phone number before connecting with other members.

Pricing: 4/5

Seeking is definitely more pricey than our other top picks, but judging from its reviews – the higher price point seems worth it!

Expect to shell out $100 for a monthly membership and $269.99 for 3 months. However, sugar babies can join for free!

Features: 4.5/5

If you prefer chatting face-to-face, Seeking offers a “Video chat” feature to make virtual dating possible. On top of that, you’ll also have access to the “Let’s Talk Sugar Blog” where you can browse valuable info on sugar dating.

9. Kasidie – Safest Swinger Website

Kasidie

Pros:

— Very safe & secure
— Personality questionnaire for better matching
— Parties & swinger events

Cons:

— You must upload a photo to be approved
— No mobile app
— Doesn’t offer refunds

Kasidie has a lot of rules upfront, which might be annoying at first.

However, you soon realise these rules help to weed out spammers and online flakes who are never going to want to meet in person. Kasidie also offers chatrooms, communities, forums, parties, and events.

Registration: 4/5

If you don’t like filling out questionnaires – you might want to skip this site.

However, on the upside, Kasidie’s 30-40 questions about your kinks and desires could help you land the swinger couple of your dreams!

Pricing: 4.4/5

Kasidie’s features are free to basic users, though more interaction requires a premium membership. You’re looking at $19.95 for a monthly plan and $15.00 for 3 months.

Features: 4/5

While Kasidie doesn’t offer a wide range of features, there are some good ones.

Like the “eXXXtra” section where you can check out some fun toys and merchandise and the “Travel” feature – allowing you to meet fellow swingers while on the go!

10. Scruff (For Gay Men) – Ideal for Finding Gay Partners for Group Fun

Scruff

Pros:

— Independent LGTBQ-owned
— “Ask me later” option when swiping local
— RSVP to swinger events

Cons:

— A “bearier” version of Grindr
— Must provide device’s location

Scruff improves upon many of Grindr’s most criticised features and offers 15 million users to swipe through. Some claim Scruff is more “bear and hairy” to Grindr’s nicely groomed young men. Take that hearsay for what it’s worth.

Registration: 3.9/5

For those of you who aren’t into geo-based apps might not like the fact you’ll need to provide your device’s location upon joining.

However, it’s pretty handy for connecting with other swingers in your area!

Plus, you can even browse through other profiles without even creating an account.

Pricing: 4.5/5

When it comes to pricing, Scruff is pretty average. You can enjoy a month membership for $14.99 and 3 months for $119.99. A premium account lets you enjoy unlimited album sharing, and the ability to sort by location.

However, you can still use the site without an account, as well as send and receive messages for free.

Features: 4/5

Scruff doesn’t seem to offer much in terms of features. But that doesn’t mean the site doesn’t have any!

The “Scruff Match” function will let you filter out other members with more ease and connect with guys who are into the same things as you!

11. Reddit Swingers R4R – Best Free Swingers Website

Reddit Swingers R4R

Pros:

— Completely free
— 194,000 members in big cities

Cons:

— Not much moderation
— Lacks extra features

Reddit is indeed the best “quick lay” of all of our swinger websites, because of its free and unmoderated system.

Post for free, reply for free, chat for free, and trade photos for free. There’s nothing in the way of matching or any online tools. But if you live in a big city and aren’t too picky about your dates – Reddit is one of the hottest sites for hot people.

12. Grindr (For Gay Men)

Grindr

Pros:

— 27 million members
— Free limited use
— Get matched quickly

Cons:

— Not much in the way of moderation
— App has occasional glitches

Grindr is everyone’s favourite go-to app for single gay life but it’s also a good pickup spot for multiple gay partners.

It might also work for the bi-curious straight man and the wife that likes to watch.

13. HER (For Gay Women) – Great for Finding Lesbian Partners for a Threesome

HER

Pros:

— Created by the LGBTQ community
— Hosts parties in major cities
— Filter by sexuality

Cons:

— Not ideal for men or MFF threesomes
— No web version

A Grindr-type app for lesbians, which means it works for lesbian group fun or threesomes where the guy is absent or maybe only watching.

Her is also a better place to meet femme trans lovers, rather than the “bearier” Grindr or Scruff.

14. Tinder – Mostly Free App for “Testing the Waters” as a Swinger Couple

Tinder

Pros:

— Limited free use
— Tons of users to sort through
— Lots of threesome-friendly guys

Cons:

— No threesome or poly searches
— Mainly geared towards younger users

Tinder is everyone’s last resort when they can’t seem to find anyone else on a more sophisticated dating site.

But there are always curious members who want to give swinging a try. You also come across threesome-friendly couples every so often.

15. Bumble – A Smarter App To Meet New Possible Swinger Friends

Bumble

Pros:

— A brainier version of Tinder
— Search for friends, lovers, or flings
— Women make first contact

Cons:

— More singles than threesome searchers
— Tedious verification process
— No wide array of gender options

A curious couple could easily make use of Bumble and its “just friends” type approach to socialising. After all, you can search for dates, for friends, or even “network” for business. But with women making the initial contact, it’s a good meeting app for poly friendships.

16. Craigslist – A Dumpster Fire Adult Personals Site That Never Disappoints

Craigslist

Pros:

— Free to register & use
— Search or post in Missed Connections

Cons:

— No moderation, besides users flagging spam
— Doesn’t always include pictures

Whether you’re reading Craigslist ads for a laugh or are actually brave enough to answer one, Craigslist still has an audience, usually for anonymous gay group fun, wife sharing relationships, or the occasional swingers for swingers ad.

Why Do People Use Swinger Dating Sites?

Some new to swinging may join a swinger website so they can see what’s out there without committing to anything. Others swingers may join a swinger website after some disappointing experiences meeting random couples at a bar, nightclub, or social event.

Some couples simply join some of the best swinger dating sites to increase their odds of finding a date, in addition to their vacation parties, bars, swinger clubs, and of course, Eyes Wide Shut swinger parties.

FAQs about the Swinging Lifestyle

FAQs about the Swinging Lifestyle

Is a Swinger Lifestyle Dangerous to a Marriage?

It depends on your level of jealousy. If you trust your partner and have high self-esteem, then there will not be any serious conflict.

Unfortunately, some swinger couples are full of “drama” because they battle with low self-esteem, and are extremely jealous and possessive of each other – despite claims to the contrary. This doesn’t work in a swinger lifestyle.

What Do Experienced Swingers Mean by Limits or Hard/Soft?

Limits and hard/soft refer to the same thing. They have rules, they have boundaries, and then have preferences. As a respectful and ethical couple, you must always follow the rules.

If you want to be sexy and push boundaries for mutual pleasure then this is what’s called a “soft limit.” A hard limit means “Never, no, not even as a joke…blocked.”

How Do I Approach Someone for the First Time on a Swinger Dating Site?

Don’t put too much pressure on an initial conversation.

A swingers website is usually mellow, compared to the more cold-blooded feel of a traditional dating site. Couples are more interested in getting to meet new people, especially if you have photos and a well-written profile.

Should I Join a Swingers Site or a Threesome Finder?

It depends, because some of the best swinger websites are firm about couples joining, or poly families joining, and do not encourage individuals to join – especially men.

Other swinger dating sites are more flexible and realise that many swingers are willing to consider a third person, male, female, or trans.

Check the rules of the site and the profile of your favourite couples to be sure.

Conclusion: Finding Local Swingers Is on Your Bucket List!

Our search found that despite some good competition from free swinger sites, the pricier options of AdultFriendFinder, Ashley Madison, SwingLifeStyle, and Swinger Dating Club were far more efficient at finding us good matches and great dates.

The meetup options were a lot of fun and discretion really matters when you get into the reality of the swinging lifestyle.

My partner and I work in the Public Relations industry and our faces are fairly well-known on a local level. That’s why we have an agreement to find swingers (people who understand how to keep things discreet) and not make us regret our choices.

We liked using a professional service catering to an adult dating site, rather than just any free swinger website. We could get to know the person(s) and make judgments about character and trust in ways that weren’t available at unmoderated sites.

Hey, don’t take my word for it. Get your partner to admit he/she fantasises sometimes and then start exploring the life you always wanted but were afraid to ask for!

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